broken bones

honestly iun eem know why i try anymore







i guess it's the fear of dying alone









back half broke in a broke down chair
both feet broke but i really don't care
bed not made and the clothes unfold
familiar symptoms, i been told

they say the definition of insanity is trying the same thing again
and expecting it turn out different
punched a wall and it broke my hand
got mad at it and punched it again

took my broken foot and i kicked a can
then my other one, the cycle begins
past midnight and i'm wide awake
fo the second day and night straight

to the drewniverse i escape
minus mask, never had a cape
without chain, no medallion
no name, just white tee stylin

man, fresh as the morning dew
orange red and purple light gleam through
and as the cycle begins anew

i could go back to the old drew




trying to do anything to skirt the real issues







even though it's eatin me away



you know i can't let you go



that's how i know i'm going crazy


but i don't know if i can do this
to feel your touch and your kiss
that's the shit that i miss
but you know what?
i gotta be honest

the way i'm feeling right now, i don't know how it's gon work
i know we can deal with these goblins
but we wont just be doing it now, cause i know you'll be trying
and that's the problem

it just won't be the same

but does that mean it just shouldn't be at all?

i guess i'm saying why do we always love the ones who hurt?
treat 'em in kind right?
i should be better than that,
but maybe it's iron pyrite

and even though you shine bright
and it's more than just the limelight
it's your glow
and ooh, girl, i love it so

it's just right now iunno

kharma

so this is what i get, huh? this is me now? all those things i did and this is how you get me? this kharma thing is a real vindictive bitch. you know, i've done my dirt. i've broken my hearts, hell, we all have. but the one time i try to do the really for real right thing and not love these hoes, this. this? really, this? i mean i've never actually BEEN the good guy before. i always have had at least 1 other one on the side. always! and i don't think i ever made any pretenses that i didn't have other ones. in high school it was "uhh, yeah. there are other girls. i'm 16, whadya want me to do, marry you NOW? meh, i'm just tryna have fun". in college it was, "nah, i don't really believe in the whole 'boyfriend/girlfriend' thing. it's all just a big fallacy anyway. just an arbitrary label society makes us wear so we don't have to tell our parents 'i want you to meet the person i'm putting penis inside/giving up my va jay jay to this semester'. it's a big joke! the only real titles are 'fiance' and 'spouse', so i hope you don't espect me to miss out on all this random college yum yum because we both like trainspotting and UGK. i'm only 19 so, hey, i'm just having fun". even after graduation when i finally gave in to the idea of having a girlfriend who wasn't just an excuse to make sexy time, it was, "i'm done playing around with scattered ass girls. but i ain't for the dating just to have somethinf tip. you can have that one. i'm cool with mine. man this single life is the shit, what with the no naggin questions, and the 'who was that bitch i seen you with' questions. now i can weed these girls out and find the good ones and keep them to myself. i mean, i'm 22: time to build the strong team so i can have fun" but now, for once in my life it's, "i look around and don't see anybody that's worth the risk of losing her. she must be special. i'm 24, and her and i are fun together". but this hatin ass hater kharma... she hit me with the okie doke. she got me. i got got. i guess that's the fate of all of us wannabe players masquerading as good guys our whole lives. when you finally start to live the part, finally actually do the good guy thing thinking you got kharma figured out, you turn around to look for her intent on gloating about how she missed you, how she didn't get you, and then you finally see her and ...

 

cold mother ffffffuuuuu-

sleepy time blues

good sleep is a myth. you never really get it. i've never gotten "good" sleep. the only sleep i've ever gotten is "whatever i could afford at the time" sleep, or "not quite enough" sleep, or "i didn't get any" sleep. yesterday, i got sleep. twice. and it was adequate, but none of it was "good". i woke up feeling refreshed, but sluggish once, and terrible from wings and beer the second time. every time i wake up i feel cheated; either i feel like the sleep was just about to get good, or that dream was getting to the big payoff and now it's gone forever. sleep and i have a very complicated relationship. sleep never let's me have it when it would be beneficial, like at night, or when i have a few hours and could use a nap. but when i don't want it sleep just HAS to get at me NOW. it's usually in an inappropriate situation: i can always find a way to fall asleep in class, or fall asleep in church, or even once behind the wheel of my car (in the neighborhood and i woke up before i hit anything... well, before i hit anything head on). it also has to get at me at times i'd rather be doing other things. when i wanna watch that movie at 10:30 sleep wants to meet up at 10:25. or when i'm at that basketball game and it's getting good, like it's really close in the third so you know the fourth is gonna be exciting, sleep wants to show me pictures of it's cat, or weave a basket or some eff''n thing. and sometimes those inappropriate sleeps are the best feeling sleeps. but you can't even enjoy those because of how wrong you know it is.

long story short is that no sleep, even the good feeling ones, are "good". well, at least for me.

10 minute break pt 2: the redux

this is the point in my career where i start to think i might have been better suited choosing a different path in life.

i really like taking my break to write about shit that's on my mind rather than spending hard earned bucks on shitty kiosk food.

all my professors this year that i didn't have last year seem to really believe in their knowledge of the law, and don't get me wrong, they're really smart, but damn. you don't have to make a brother feel like an a-hole for not quite being there yet.

part of me wants to grow my fro back. i know i won;t be able to wear one again until i prove myself as a serious legal mind, so while i'm a silly 1L-2L i want to do it one last time.... also i wanna beat Ashley's fro

paying attention in class is for squares. like pants!

i figure that with my health, advances in modern medicine, and my future high income, it's not unrealistic to believe i could live to be 245-300 years.

there's this wicked awesome looking fan made Pokemon game that appears to run on the SFIII engine. if you're not creaming your pants 1) clearly you're not a nerd, and thus should reevaluate your life, and/or 2) you lack the vision to truly understand the gravity of that proclamation. let me spell it out: imagine you took the most bad-ass fighting monsters on Nintendo's roster (that are bipedal) and instead of having to wait your turn to throw an attack, you just had them go at it in a 1-on-1 no holds barred two round match. if that doesn't do it for you, just watch this. see.? wow...

was ithe only one that watched the pro bowl and thought: "wow. this is really really bad"